Council Member Martinez Joins Forces with Austin Facial Hair Club In Search of Tug-O-War Glory
AUSTIN, TX - In a bold move, propped up with the promise of Lonestar Beer, queso and whiskey, Council Member Martinez has united the clans of the Austin Facial Hair Club (AFHC) and will answer the Mayor’s Fun Fun Fun Fest Aqua Olympics tug-o-war challenge. The Aqua Olympics will take place August 19 at Fiesta Gardens, with registration and opening ceremonies beginning at 4 p.m. and the games taking place from 5 p.m. - 8 p.m. “Much like ebony and ivory, my bald head and lack of facial hair will unite forces with the follicly-gifted in sweet tug-o-war harmony,” said Council Member Martinez. “I am assured that on their expedition to Trondheim, Norway, last year, the mead flowed and they were handed down untold secrets from the ghost of Viking King Olaf Tryggvason. We fear no one on roller skates!” The Second Annual Fun Fun Fun Fest Aqua Olympics will not only feature a tug-o-war for the ages, attendees will also find food, music, paddle board jousting, synchronized swimming and, best of all, a taco cannon. “We have always admired Council Member Martinez’s inner beard from afar. He fights for many of the same things we do -- independence, freedom, and the right to dance in public. It is for these reasons, and more, that we proudly join the Martinez team in the spirit of unity. Together, we should handily destroy the Mayor’s roller derby lady squad, returning honor to the North,” said Bryan Nelson, Grand Chancellor, AFHC. Founded in 2007 with the goal of representing Austin, Texas, and the country in the 2009 World Beard and Moustache Competition, AFHC is dedicated to promoting positive facial hair awareness and having a good time. They are committed to raising awareness and funds to send hairy Texans across the land in search of fame and glory for Texas. The AFHC is open to all men and women; hirsute, in pursuit, or just generally enthused by facial hair. Since their founding, the AFHC has fielded teams for the 2010 BTUSA National Competition and the 2011 World Beard and Moustache Championships in Trondheim, Norway.